Ok ok…I’m feeling better…less manic…I’m not cursing the day first thing. This one lasted. They’re getting worse…the fits…the episodes. I don’t know how long I can hold them off, keep them in check before I do something stupid. The other morning I became a beast, embarrassed myself, what’s new?
And I need all the reasons I can find not to hate myself. But it’s hard. Even the idea makes me shiver. Because I see loving myself like looking down on others. Riding around on a high horse. And I never want to think I’m better then the people I see on the street. The ones who have it rough. The ones who don’t fit in. The ones I see my own face in.
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