Soon she’ll be here. So I count down the days until she arrives. Having something to look forward to goes a long way. Life is often spent in envy of the future, summer, birthdays, retirement. I do my best to live in the moment, but everyone needs a dream. It softens the blows of reality.
And I need all the reasons I can find not to hate myself. But it’s hard. Even the idea makes me shiver. Because I see loving myself like looking down on others. Riding around on a high horse. And I never want to think I’m better then the people I see on the street. The ones who have it rough. The ones who don’t fit in. The ones I see my own face in.
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