I smoke a joint while we finish our coffee sitting at the table in the sun. It's a pleasant ritual. And it won’t be any better than this all day so I try to drag it out as long as I can. But the minutes tick off like seconds. I leave reluctantly.
And I need all the reasons I can find not to hate myself. But it’s hard. Even the idea makes me shiver. Because I see loving myself like looking down on others. Riding around on a high horse. And I never want to think I’m better then the people I see on the street. The ones who have it rough. The ones who don’t fit in. The ones I see my own face in.
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